That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Randomize
