I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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