That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
