we have officially lost it.
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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