Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
