Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
