So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
