I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Randomize
