um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
