you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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