dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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