how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
