trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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