they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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