Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
