dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
