Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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