So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
