well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
