Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize
