singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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