Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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