...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
