so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
