It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
