Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
