I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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