i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
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