You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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