In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
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