I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
