my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
