problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
