I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I think a kid would responsible me up
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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