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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.

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• (845): View more from New York

  dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"

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• (212): View more from New York

  There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...

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