I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
