so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
