How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
