so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize