are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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