similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
