Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
