I can tuck mytits in my pants
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
