Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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