Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
