i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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