Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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