oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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