I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
