i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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